(GE Copy)

Chapter 16a: In “Clarity” (Part 1)

“In a stir of madness where thoughts ran like wildfires, there came a moment of awareness, a consciousness at long last...”

In the blue haze of a sapphire sky, all was black upon the ground. The air was navy blue and a translucent fog cast beams of light upon the ground like the bottom of a lake. He could not place this realm, yet it seemed familiar. Dimly there glowed an opaque blue stone, of ancient writing and another of a shambled pillar. It radiated as he got near but soon found himself watched by two judging eyes. He ran towards them, as though knowing the force and pulled the trickster out of the veil. She seemed indifferent, and he followed her through the crystal mire. She gave no courtesy yet he felt intrinsically bound. As if having only met, they had been inseparable but it would not last. He could see the outline of his room, and closed his eyes in fear he’d loose her forever, walking further into the love of this dream.

The path, old and weathered by time, seemed electric; like a living being had passed a wind through the stone, locked away within, and shuttered at their coming. At it’s end, was a mountain spire, of a broken tower. In it’s cracks, there could be a light that shined from within and the desire to restore it embodied him. She smiled, and he knew it, but could not see it. Her lips had been taught but the cold in her eyes could still reveal her soul. He looked into them, and she placed her palm upon his eyes, and grabbed his wrist to drag him into a kiss. It didn’t feel right, but he wanted it more and more until as a slave, he followed her; wanting nothing more than her love... But she would not embrace him any longer, and sent him to work.

They travelled in search of stones, but the lifeless rock would not bind to another like it once would. Neither would the waters restore the light, nor his words connect the lands. He knew they couldn’t repair the damages, because the wall was set between them, and the magic would no longer tether between them. This was her kingdom, doomed to fail into obscurity, a fallen, forgotten place. A dying memory, dying with her.

Aaron looked up, and saw at long last, the wall that was cast between them; a filament that he deluded himself from. It was always there. He could feel her suffocate from within, watching the wall between them force her to wither back into the eather. As she began the dissipate, the stone, and land fell from it’s form and collapsed as she did. He ran off towards her, but could not hold the winds from flowing out of her and each hand blew it away. From the veil she was formed, and the form that was ripped into existence, could not be retained. She looked into him, with eyes that spoke forgotten histories; and he remembered now what he had done to her. The anger, the frustration, he had done this to her in spite and vengeance. She was dying, because of his selfishness, coveting the memory of a time when her voice could speak. “I have to give it back...” Desperately apologizing, he tried to fold the pieces back from the void, but without the voice of life, she was only a mud running through his fingers onto mist and ash. “I took this from you... I have to give it back! We’re not done yet, I have to rebuild the tower!” As the thing most precious to him died in his hand. All he could hear was a loud ear shattering ringing of his alarm, like bombs dropped on his head. As his eyes shot awake with a gasp he watched the room fold back to it’s form like an accordion and gravity returned straight from it’s bending curvature.

Aaron risen to turn off the deafened ringing of his alarm, feeling disoriented without his equilibrium and fell back in bed. He laid there, silently sweating, recalling the moments leading up to this. It was dull and every sense numbed like seeing it through a glass pane, but from the other side of the lens, disconnected and separate. Even the loud lawn mower outside was quiet and his head felt like a bowling ball. There was a silence, like a part of his heart faded, and he returned to the world however vaguly. He laid there, imagining what happened and for what seemed like five minutes, only to become an hour in a flash before him. With the cold dry skin, and a mouth devoid of moisture, he left his bed. Clinging to the railing, Aaron continued about his morning, making his way back to where all the answers seemed to lay.

The pressure on his ears only seemed to be getting heavier as he walked down the woodland path towards the lake. After finally making the hills bottom, he wiggled his ears, tired of the impairment and they popped opened. Finally able to hear again, he made his way towards the bird sanctuary. Everything was still peculiarly off kilter between the his sleepy head and the bustling visceral world around him. Once he had a chance to settle down, things had become more normal, and he blamed it on the cold ambient atmosphere of today’s windy overcast.

Along the water’s edge, Aaron took the moist air into his lungs, while withholding his gagging reflex. The stagnant water was a poor entrance and for a moment he wondered if it would work again. It felt like every moment of his mind was elsewhere, and disconnected from the wood under his hands, he couldn’t build up the nerve to publicly pass through. There were people present, walking the boardwalk behind him and he lost the nerve to enter. He stood, cold, staring at the rippling swamp water, and the nasty green stuff that formed, finding a new plethora of things to despise about it. ‘But what about the girl?’ Aaron figured, ‘Psht! Another useless dream...’ There was no shaking this distraction.

“What a blur yesterday was, I can’t even count all the things that happened...” From beneath, was a wriggle. A little flick in the water, and it emerged to look at him with it’s unassuming jaded eyes. Aaron smiled, “You waited for me, did you?... Didn’t think you’d care that much about me.” Tipping himself freely over the edge to meet with his friend.

Barely clung by it’s teeth to his shirt as they crawled the shoreline, Aaron helped the snake back onto his shoulder and it nestled along his neck for their hike.

Walking down the steps of the old house, Aaron sat down at the table and watched the hands on his watch tick by. The quiet of this retreat was a solace to the tiresome waiting, and his dwindling focus had time to rest and restore, in between flashes of his dream. “what a mess... and yet, most fascinating to mean so much and so little.”

Aaron looked up, and could picture himself happily seated to such a nice view every day, even if the wood floor creaked more than was comfortable upon the slightest of breezes. “Well, where’s your buddy?” The old man greeted, coming down the steps, placing a basket of fresh items by his outdoor counter space.

“Said he’d be here whenever he could get around to it. His folks probably got him re-stuffing the taxidermy or something”

“You know, you only barely grabbed anything of interest...” The old man heckled “He’ll be lucky if there is anything left for him. What was his name again?”

“Mud... His name is Mud...”

“Would have sworn it was Zack, or Zachery or Zechariah something. Oh well, just when you think you know a boy...”

By the passing hour, Zack finally arrived. Aaron was already put to work in study which was rather menial. He was charged with moving two gemstones together. He had already been warmed up with reading the emanation of both individually, and now it was to read the reaction thereof. He had just spent a good portion of his time here already, barely grasping the intricacies of their erratic signatures. It felt like a pulsing of expanding energies, oscillating between the other and disrupting any semblance of rhythm. He felt so close to understanding something much greater than the surface, but try as he would, he was still so far from enlightenment.

Zachery opened his mouth to speak, but Aaron could feel the tension in the air and beat him to it. “Zack, I swear if you make a wise ass remark at this time, I’m going to throw myself off that balcony a second time and continue my lesson from the back of a turtle.”

Zachery closed his mouth and laid his bag next to the wall. “You’re late, Mud!” Kaylemen warmly welcomed. That was a joke, he wasn’t happy at all. In fact, Kaylemen was pretty friggen disappointed.

“Good to see you too...” Zack quietly uttered while passing Aaron.

“What?” The old man hollered. “Speak up!”

Aaron dropped the two stones on the table. His chi, and/or focus was broken. Though he couldn’t fault anyone, he had been struggling with it for the last twenty minutes and it was time to take a break anyway. At least his studies this time revolved around something practical. He couldn’t say he got very far, but it felt like it meant a whole lot more than his lessons with the space man.

The serpent came to comfort him, wrapping itself around his arm towards the table then peered into his eyes. Aaron exasperated, falling back into his chair and rested a moment while vaguely listening to the old guy give Zack a penalitive task. Whatever it was, in Zack’s absence, Aaron had some peace again.

The wind blew in the valley, and it was almost calming for once, even as it breezed across his skin; ripping the warmth and imparting the cold from beneath. Unable to return his eyes back to the stones, Aaron looked to his side, where Kaylemen stood making something on the stove. “Say,” Aaron pondered, glumly, to distract himself. “You’re ‘other life’ as you put it. What did ever happen with that... I mean, if it’s no burden...”

“I have nothing to hide,” Kaylemen admit, cracking the last of his orange stones on the stove top. “These scars are lessons that go beyond the textbook. They are the real lesson... If it were meant for me alone, they would be on the inside, but these scars face towards both of us don’t they?...”

“I’m not sure I see them, not as you do, anyway... You mentioned that you studied these?...” Rotating the stone in his hands “That there were schools...”

Hovering above him, the old man lent atop his table. “Schools?” He smirked cynically, “I wrote a grand thesis in them alright, and was shunned for my findings; bloody bobbin pickets, har’malda, har’malda! If my sullied tongue could curse them any harder, har’malda!...” Recollecting himself. “But, yes... I was knowledgeable. Most knowledgeable yet, was to leave them.”

“Why did you leave them?” Sympathizing with his own pain.

“Why... Child?” As though Aaron should have already known the answer to why.

With the weary weight in his eyes, Aaron returned, “Was there nothing left to learn?” Listing off his concerns, “Would they refuse to teach you any more?

Returning to his counter, Kaylemen continued, “Surely you have seen them, such proud men, the usury which they trail behind? Observing the outcomes and ignoring the reasons that brought it, as though it may absolve them of trying to change their own path; fating themselves to guiltless inevitability and justified failures, ‘it’s just our nature after all’...” Smacking his lips. “Why should this tragedy bring you such interest to know?”

“Were they just too full of themselves to give anything useful? Just... Trying to make sense of it all... Why it’s been this hard to find anything useful until now.”

“They were easy to watch me trail behind, a lamb to laugh at for their own frail success...” Dashing in the last spice into his pot, “But I left their usage. Be it after a decade of pretending I was something I wasn’t. A fool would blindly believe such men were ‘mighty’ just for proclaiming themselves as such upon word and popularity alone, but not I... Knowledge... It was to be given so others may flourish. That lives be made better... They hid their knowledge from the hands of others, who could use it for good, while calling it the fear of their safety. But as we learned the cautions of it’s weight, they withheld their knowledge even still; not to those who were unlearned, no, but to those who were not obedient.”

“That seems harsh...” Taking in a momentary reflection to his own guiltily ‘harsh’ comments about Belship.

“Harsh? What would you rather call liars and hypocrites? It was not about safety, as they gave it to another just as learned as I. They had no idea what we would do with it, and that frightened them... And I... I was feeding that monster by being the person they could shame in front of the others, to guide them away: I was the example of what they called ‘stupid’, so the others would follow along the alleged ‘enlightened ones’. That’s an irony of description, as though it didn’t mean what it used to anymore.” Pausing to inspect the shell of his meal, he chucked it off the balcony, and returned to severing the membranes of the rest with great skill and intricacy. His frail old hands slipped in underneath, and pressed the sides until the floral flesh rolled out onto his plate of greens. “Chulndra, they’re poisonous unless handled correctly, just like everything else in life. Causes drowsiness in small quantities; they synthesize these with a Gorra flask, because they’re too afraid to learn the technique, that even a toddler could be taught... And just like that, I could prove myself a hundred times over, and they simply chose to look away whenever it was obvious; and then, and then!” Dropping his knife, “They had the audacity years later to lie, after it seemed impossibly to reprove it, saying: ‘No, you failed, don’t you remember, I remember you failing, that’s what happened there, you liar! You’re a benghalhet, we can’t trust you! No one will listen to you now!’ spouting such obvious, childish, duplicitous lies...” Solemnly wiping the frivolous texture from his tongue with his hand. His cheek twitched, spitting the bitter component of his food off the deck. “To leave their games, gave them less fodder to fuel a lie, and I could be spared to learn beyond the skew of their egocentric doctrine... Ego... Eaugh! Even in the simple life, without grand equipment and in times of detrimental poverty... I have learned much more of wisdom in the simple, than picking apart a lie that is obvious. I already learned all I ever needed to survive alone. They need not me, for they know their own guilt more than I, or anyone... They’ve already confirmed this already. They are in love with their guilt but will never take responsibility for it. Har’malda! Har’malda! Oh... Bugger them, that is my story... Now leave me be...” Looking to Aaron’s deeply depression pouts, Kaylemen set his scars aside. “Yes, boy... We have seen that side of things, indeed...”

Aaron remained seated as Kaylemen returned with his tea pot and shelled berries. Counting the clouds above, the boy hoped to renew his focus and tend to this lesson further but stumbled, distracted, and called out to the old man. “How long do you suppose he’ll be gone for? At this point Zack’s not going to be around for anything...”

“That’s the point.” Kaylemen revealed, mumbling on his pitted berry flesh. “There are lessons you cannot learn without deprivation, such as taking the opportunity when it is present: The desire to learn is given so rarely. If he wants to learn, he will arrive at a reasonable time, and he will come ready to work. It’s hard enough teaching one person, but two must be in tandem, else they will learn alone regardless, and there is no changing that reality. He will need to catch up on his own, but I will not tolerate his behaviour this early in. This is his first lesson; If he will learn then he will learn, or he will not, it is simply the bargain of this exchange. You have your own to worry over, fret not over his.”

Glumming to himself, Aaron dug into his real concern. “What if something happens out there? I barely got by on my own, those spectres... They’re awfully close to here...”

“Iswana is quite capable...” Spitting out a rogue shell husk, “Besides, a muted voice is no pleasure for them to take any longer. Without it, the spirit is a flavourless conquest. Can’t say the same for Zachery, might be a bountiful four course meal, but when one looses one sense...”

“...One gains another.”

“Yeah, it’s called vengeance...” Trying to whistle out whatever was between his teeth, “I mean, vigilance... Eh, whichever of the two makes you angry at someone. She’ll know when they’re near and will bugger off. Worst you’ll get from them is laryngitis. Permanent, but you’ll walk it off. Helps with the snoring too.”

“I’m not so certain it’s only the voice... Last night, when... It was like it sucked me out with a straw, motivation, energy, every sense and emotion. Before I knew it, everything was almost dark... Although...” Aaron Admit, “I kinda had it wrapped around my face, there wasn’t a lot to see anyway.”

“Iswana could tell you all about it... ‘Cept she cant...” Taking a puff. “There are many worse things in the woods than they, albeit few as haunting... They are a sequential evil, and have ripped the voice of more than just my girl. They have taken the voices of many maiden and wildlife, yes, even them too... Nature’s service as it were, quieting the Feckle Twets and all that... Even my uncle had only half the voice to speak with, narrowly saved by the skin of his teeth. However the young man who saved him fifty seasons or so back... He was ‘not so lucky it had seemed’ as old Klen had put it. Was it worth it, giving the young boy’s voice up for the old man? Not much good it did him, seeing as Klen up and croaked up a few years ago. Ain’t doing much talking with the other half of his voice anymore. The boy sure thought it was heroic thing at the time I’d wager, perhaps years have taught him these afflictions are not so light as they appear up front... But, wisdom... Wisdom and vengeance, yes sir. He got the whole fruit now. Right, back to you work!” Yawning in the mid-morning sun, “You’ve run my mouth on long enough, it’s nap time.” Popping his last berry, he lifted himself from the table. “Remember, exhaustion was good for you before, don’t rest too long now... I’d hope you progressed when I awake...”

Aaron peered down at the table, and the same haze overtook his eyes. “I’m not sure if I can focus at all today.” Taking much more fondly to listening to old stories. Aaron wasn’t ill, neither was his sleep interrupted, but the memory of his dream lingered in the background. All he could feel was the latent guilt of watching that person fade, because he was angry at them once upon a never existing time. He knew that he never actually did anything to anyone, it was a dream and there was no point in even asking, but Aaron looked to the snake and asked. “Have... You ever... I suppose it’s nothing,” and it’s head turned away. He could hear the sounds of someone’s voice, and soon saw them walking back from the path overhead. Zachery, rather chummy, telling tales to the girl with no voice. She followed, vaguely interested but had not the voice to share her own story. A voice, also taken away. Aaron couldn’t let it go, and the snake turned it’s sight back to him once more. “Did they take your voice too?” It seemed to intrigue the serpent, and it understood the words but Aaron felt ashamed to have even asked. “You just seem... Like her...” Pointing to Iswana. “The disposition, silent... silently jaded...” And it appeared as though the vain words from his mouth had reached the serpent.

“HEY! Old man!” Zack called out. “I got those stones you wanted! The orange ones! Where the hell is he?” Watching Aaron flip out at him. “Oh shit, the spectres got to you!”

“Shhhh!” Aaron hissed, whispering adamantly “He’s asleep!”

“Wait... They actually did? I was joking, it must be worse than I thought...” Still hearing the whining hiss of Aarons lips, Zachery yelled louder “He’s what?”

Aaron palmed his face, running up to meet Zachery who was fighting Iswana’s hand over his mouth.

Zack lifted the hand, scowling “It’s not bad enough that everyone’s gone quiet today, but you gotta make me silent too? Shit, now I know how Sophie feels...”

Having straightened things out, Aaron returned to his table, renewing his lesson from the beginning. Somehow, he could feel the motions within the stone, more so than before, but yet his eyes would not shine as when he had first discovered this magic. More dimly awake, they were of someone whose senses were aware but not of the gift he once possessed. This glaze was blasé, and lethargic, a lifeless lens and Aaron supposed it was sufficient enough to pass through the day.

Zack had sat down, following suit, attempting to comprehend his homework while the master was away. Aaron tried catching Zack up to pace with the lessons before they would be graded but Zack couldn’t help but notice the snake Aaron had become most comfortable with. “That’s kind of a freaky ass snake you keep wearing like a scarf... Frayed viper fins, teeth like a two fisted anesthesist...”

“You know it can understand you... It’s unnervingly intelligent.”

“So, it like a chick snake or a dude snake?”

“I don’t know, I don’t go around looking at it’s wedding tackle...”

“The scales are kinda feminine but I’m not really an expert on them. Hasn’t asked to marry yet, has it?” Aaron and snake gave Zack an odd look. “Right, I’ll leave you to it...”

Aaron returned his focus to the step at hand, but it seemed much easier to teach Zachery than it was to practise it himself. “I’m getting really tired of this shit...” Aaron complained. Zack looked up to it but Aaron waved away at the concern. No matter how much he tried to delude it, Aaron just couldn’t shake from his lifeless daydream. It would probably be like this all day and he sighed with his hands combed through his hair to hold up his head..

They heard a wet thwack, and jumped. “What the...” Wiping the fowl splatter from his arm, Zack looked to the large white spot on the table, then to the sky where a large, and rather relieved looking bird flew culprit “Oh... fuck you...” Zack probably shouldn’t have said that. Well, being Zack, it did not take long before that bird came down to ask Zack to repeat it in person. Oh, and yeah, bird was pissed, “Does everything in this world speak fuckantonese or what?!” Whaling to remove the giant angry bird from him. “GET THIS BITCH OFF ME!” But that bird had a real vendetta. Eventually buggering off, but, at least they didn’t wake up the master.

“I think you have a curse...” Aaron redundantly announced, applying the salve to his buddy’s cuts.

“Yeah, it’s called ‘fuck you!’ to the next cheeky twat that does that again...” Zack... Poor, Zack, probably shouldn’t have said that either, but he got off clean this time.

Having taken a hint, Aaron left Zack to the lesson. There was no hope of clearing Aaron’s head, not there anyway. Even knowing better than to dwell on it, the topical voice eaters, it was all he could think about. It returned him back onto the nightmare which echoed louder and louder. It was like a shade fell over his eyes and he lost all sight of the world as he heard it repeat in his heart: ‘I took it away from you, I need to give it back... I took it away from you...’ Something so illogical, incomprehensible, unfathomable, yet undoubtedly horrifying as he felt every ounce of guilt pass over from his sleep. It felt as though there was something that he had to do, creeping up to it’s destined time, or all the future that laid beyond the swinging door of fate would be closed forever; but he had no idea what to do about it, nor when, nor why. Perhaps he remembered another time when we was posed with this same quandary, faltered to take heed, and was left to wonder what would have happened if he did what was asked of him: Like it was always there under the surface, just waiting for something to stumble across to remember it. As if it were yesterday, Aaron saw the vivid instant that faded so long ago. Starring at a blank wall, in an old house with Grandma, where a world used to glimmer from beyond the closed and weathered gates... End of recording.

Pacing the grassy flat above the house, Aaron fret, wondering how to quell the living nightmare. “I just want to get on with today but everything always seems to come back to it.” Unable to explain the downward spiral onto this livid unrest, he looked down to the sentient beast on his shoulder, and recalled the anomaly of having met, asking. “With all this random chance, when it all came together so uncannily... You’re not just some random snake I found in a pond, are you? You really can hear me, right? You know ‘nod’, Yes?” And it did. He couldn’t find the words which slipped away, only ached to relieve the stress with the vanity of his voice. “Did... They take it from you? The spectres, writs, writhes... Whatever they are... Do... Do you want it back?” And for a moment, Aaron could see it shed a tear. A tiny, glowing, snake tear. It touched something inside him that Aaron put away. “So... This is what this fucked up world wanted me to do, is it?... Destiny or whatever? I understand.” Holding the serpent nearer like a crutch for his own sadness. “I never knew what all this means, but it always seems to fall into place. It feels like I’ve known you my entire life, and I don’t know why that is, just... Unavoidable at this point, isn’t it? The gift... Whatever’s been driving me since I was a kid... Like another hand, guiding my other hand and my body dragged along with it...” And for a split moment, it felt as though he would do anything for it’s love. “Do I even have choice anymore, or will this voice ever leave me alone?”

Zack climbed the steps, announcing his presence. “Well, I’m bored... What are you up to?” Hoping not to get any more sass today.

Aaron seemed static, stationary, stoic and void, like a chipped statue, mixed in emotions, pondering it’s own marbled conflictions. Zack approached him, and listened to his friend utter, seemingly unaware. “Is this some kind of messed up gift... Perhaps a curse? These thoughts... Like a ransom...” But Zack did not understand any of what Aaron had conjectured. “Everywhere I look, all I see are them. All I remember are them... It’s like a nightmare that happens in the day time. There is this memory that plays, like a destiny I failed to fulfill... It eats me, telling me to go back to sleep, and when I do, it sends me back into the world. These dreams are becoming more than just dreams now. It’s like a voice that tells me a story, and then how to escape... It’s never been this bad before, not since... Not since seeing what I saw out there. After that, everything changed... Forever... And all I want to do is forget. Everything important to me, fades away, like it always does.” His snake nuzzled him, and Aaron’s eyes fell upon it. Zack paced slowly nearer, encircling his friend’s side from afar as the strange nuance of Aaron’s discussion showed no sign of becoming clearer. “I only have so much time, after all. Perhaps this is all made to protect me. Maybe then, I’ll be saved from these blackmails and accusations to my soul... Maybe it’s just out there, beyond what I’m most hesitant of...”

“You’re really starting to scare me man.” Zack uttered, still not sure if Aaron even heard him or not.

“Just over those hills... I know what is over there... Maybe the answer is as well... Or maybe it’ll just pile more guilt on me...”

“You’re gonna need to start making sense Aaron...”

“If they really can’t hurt me...” Finishing his thought, “Then, perhaps they really can’t kill me either...”

“Have I missed something? You seem to think your invincible or something. You hit your head on the crazy tree or something? Start taking normal!”

“No...” Finally replying, “I just finally figured it out.” Aaron replied, looking sideways but not enough to meet Zack’s eyes. “Got a Guardian Angel, might as well take it for a spin.”

“The snake?”

“No...” Aaron moaned, vexed by the insinuation. “Not... The bloody snake, Zack, it’s a figure of bloody speech. I only have so much time left, until I run out of time, and there will not be any more time left if I don’t...”

“This isn’t like you... You’re calm, methodical, timid... I can’t believe I just used a word that large to describe you man... Where’d that word even come from?”

“It’s more of me than you think... I can’t even remember anymore, what you even know about me Zack: Things I can’t remember, things I keep forgetting to tell you. Things standing right in front of you... What’s really going on behind the scenes, things not even Sophie knows!... They’ll do to me what they did to Penticton, unless I will find that answer, and quell these nightmares within me once and for all. It feels like it’s finally out there, the answers falling into place one after another... At long last... Then again, I suppose it always does... And never arrives.”

“I’m not keeping up to speed here. It sounds like something’s trying to kill you, but there’s nothing around us. It’s just us... You think you’ll find the truth out there?” Pacing forwards and back, Zack reasoned, unsure what he could make of any reason of it at all. “If you found nothing, would that be the truth? Will death bring it? Or would it mean that there is just nothing? Coz this is going past eleven right now...”

“Nothing would be nice.” Aaron warmed up, “I’d like to be wrong... I don’t want truth anymore, I’ve left that desire behind me, all it does is hurt me and condemn me now... All I need, is a bigger stick to smack my enemies with. If I can’t find one, I’ll make one, then maybe I’ll be safe... Maybe then I can breath normally...”

“I don’t claim to understand what’s going on, and I’m not gonna understand if you can’t start making sense.”

“I don’t understand either...” Rearing himself to go, temping himself past the threshold of his decisions and break past his fears. “All I know is this urge within me only itches worse and worse until I do something about it, even if it’s the wrong thing, or the right...”

“You know you’re my brother... You’ve always talked a little crazy...”

“And yet I always seem to come through...”

“I would be with you Aaron, but when I heard you talking that shit to yourself, it’s got me freaked out. It keeps getting worse and worse, every day, this maddening journey you got going on; I’m shaking man... I thought that I could believe in it; that, whatever bravery you got, meant something --that it was something to look up to, but now I see it’s just another step towards the grave. Come on, lets sit down and talk about it.”

“It won’t stop the voices... I’ve tried that long ago, I closed the gate, and they returned to haunt me, even years later...” Speaking as though it were rehearsed, his mouth moving, and his eyes unable to follow. As though someone else spoke for him, once again and it began to make sense. “The only reason I’m still alive, is because I’m the hostage in this... They need me poking around, if I’m to be of any use to them. How else do I survive a baker’s dozen of incidents from hell? Think about it, how many times have we narrowly escaped death? You’d be safest with me, the master takes care of his slaves after all... Probably the only reason you survived all that either. Count it... We should be dead by now. Someone is watching us, and whatever is in my head, is the only voice getting me out of this. The uncanny, the unbelievable, it’s all happened in a sequence, event on event, leading me somewhere. It knows what the score is, and dies when I do... It’s fate, and it’ll do anything to survive...”

“It’s leading you down a rabbit hole, nothing more, and there is no end of an endless journey. You keep making reasons to do these things, dragging us with you... Look, I don’t understand how to deal with it, but you’ll get us both killed!” Pacing more furiously, “I’m not going with you...” Zack threatened, calling Aaron’s bluff.

“I know Zack...” Finally picking up the never to walk away. “You’re place is out there... I always knew... It's not like I've really got a choice anymore. I know I'm going to end up there regardless if I want to or not, it's only a matter of time. I'm hard wired that way, after all... That or they'll change the doors on me last second like they always do. I’m a puppet to them. I’m everyone's bloody puppet...” Slowly fading in the distance

“Are you going to come back?” But no answer. “What about all this stuff that you’ve worked to find, you going to give all that up to chase some fantasy delusion? It’s just like when you ran after that ghost, all over again! Stuck in your ways, enchanted. It’s insane!” But Aaron was too distant to give an answer anymore. “What in crap is he even talking about...” Zack shook his head, holding onto his bluff, hoping that Aaron would turn around. Every desire to help him, and knowing there was nothing he could do to change Aaron’s mind. “He’s got those eyes... Doesn’t he...” Noticing the gloom that followed him, “...The ones that lash out but instead of anger, it’s... Something sadder. Like a dark haze...” In a dark realm, with a clear dim sky that followed him. “He’s done it twice before to us... Just like at the hotel...”

“A real go getter, ain’t he?” The old man commented, climbing his steps. “Compulsive, heroic, unwavering. Vanity like that doesn’t come very often, at least not in one actually willing to do something about it. Everyone else is just a chicken PSHEAT about it.” Revelling at the show of determination. “The fire of a confused man, full of youth and no way of getting it out; born to live fast and die beautiful, yup. Been there, done that before... Sure been nice knowing him.” The old man opened his mouth and hollered, “KNOCK’EM SENSELESS KID!” Cheering on his pupil. “Was gonna teach him about these funky Chalsalian stones and give him a real head trip after I woke up but he’s up and gone now... Sure be nice to know what he’s up to though...”

“He’s got enough of a head trip as is... Wait, so you didn’t hear what happened?”

“Nope! Sure didn’t... Sounded real good though; came up to watch the fury in his eyes, that sure would have been a show to see!... But, looks like I missed it... Still, I know hellbent passion for the grave when I sees it. Son of a bitch makes me proud!... Even if he is a dumbass for wasting my time... Oh well! Guess I’m retired again, back to my pipe...”

“What do you mean? He off to die or something? Wait, retired? What about me? This was a package deal!”

Aaron lifted the snake to his eyes, and peered within. “You seem to understand this, what’s happening to me, don’t you? These odd coincidences, these murmurs, how they’ve come together... I don’t understand why, but you seem to be the key to unlocking all of this... I will return your voice to you, that you can tell me what it all means. I have to... I remember now. I only have a few days before they come with their decision. I keep forgetting... They’re coming for me, to erase me. I can’t let that happen... I can’t let them keep taking my memories...”

Such tribulations usually caused Aaron the most stress but his focus would not be impeded by anything. He held his friend and consoled it, petting it with his thumb. He didn’t know how, but his journey had to be preordained. There were no other answers along the slithering trail.

Aaron came onto the fork in the road where two paths met onto his own. There was right and left. He remembered taking the higher road yesterday, favouring the rise in elevation and leaving the lower path through the trees alone. Aaron returned upon the logical path and came onto a man with a cart who seemed exhausted from the climb below. The serpent hid itself amidst Aaron’s nape, peeking out from time to time, quite hesitantly shy of making any acquaintance. The man greeted, “Hail, traveller,” Wiping the sweat from his face, “Where have you come?”

“Down the road,” Aaron passed by the weathered transport worker, answering the silence that awkwardly followed. “It’s by an old man who practises gems...”

“That crazy old coot? Had his grand daughter drag me out there one time, man’s got himself an aging problem, it’s in the head. Hope I don’t become that when I turn in my talents for retirement.” As another rock gave the load trouble.

Aaron looked behind him, at the man’s struggles and sympathized. “Do you need help pulling the cart?”

“No more than you need asking...” Aaron approached. “That’s a no, boy...” The man cautioned him. “That was a no...”

“Oh, just... Trying to be helpful.” Aaron turned, bashfully confused.

The man grit a cackling chuckle, “Trying to be helpful will only get your nuts cut off, kid!... People don’t just get better coz you wanna help them. They gotta do it their damned selves... If you’re lucky, it’ll be someone else chopping off yer baby bells, instead of yourself doing it, yes sir... Found that out the hard way: Pawned the ring for eight quents and drank it all away the same night. Best time I had the entire marriage. Yup, never marry your prostitute. All they know is fucking people, and boy did I go second pipe on that one.”

Wanting to leave the conversation, Aaron couldn’t quite bring himself to go in blind and turned once more to ask, “Say, there anything to keep the local voice eaters off my back?”

“They sure are topical, now aren’t they? Seems all that anyone has to talk about nowadays is them. You sure are a weird one if you want anything to do with them.”

“Brimstone, saltpetre, bad music? Anything like that work? I’d prefer to be talking about this time tomorrow...”

“Makes sense.” Tenaciously rolling over a large stone in the path “Anyone who has succeeded ain’t exactly talking though, now are they?... Wait no, I’m not sure that’s how it works actually... Well, if someone has, I ain’t heard of it. Just keep your mouth shut, they might think you’s already serviced. No fun for them, just like when my wife came to bed late at night... But we know...”

“Thanks I guess.” Aaron undesirably gratified, seeing the wide curve in the road with the stream past it and an escape from the man’s brash condescension. “Anyway, this is where I get off... Good luck with your future wives.” Capping off this conversation by waving off the indignant soul.

“Wives?” The man continued anyway, “A ring’ll only close her up for you in more ways than one... Take my advice; keep your whemen at your hip and at arms length at all times, that’s what I always say!”

“Worked well for you...” Aaron smirked cynically until the man was out of sight, before muttering to himself “What a complete sleazebag...” Aaron walked towards the water’s edge. Taking off his shoes, Aaron dipped his toes into the water, but the depth wasn’t favourable for walking in. He was even ready to remove his pants from getting wet for the sixth time in twenty four hours, but took to the grassy sidelines instead. Aaron huffed some cynical chuckles, thinking of the jerk he just met. He turned to the snake, and joked. “You’re not going to bite my nuts off, are you?”

But the silence seemed more unnerving this time. Aaron did up his shoes, and took to his overgrown path. It was a beautiful stream, worthy of spending an hours’ pleasure and stay but the swirling worries from all angles took away what rest there was left in his head. He remembered the peace, of times when he was free from this spiritual ransom, but carried on. The return of those days, that would have to fuel him through this journey.

For ages he walked, but found the bridge at long last. Aaron could take the spear grass from his socks and continue back on whence he came, to confront the destiny that was painfully repeating in his vivid mind. He had only just returned his socks free from the prickles he accumulated when a man had walked by the split just down the road. The snake hid again, and Aaron turned his head onto it to find the man from earlier. Their eyes met, and the traveller opened his mouth. “Hey, I wouldn’t walk that path, if yer worried about them spectres.”

Aaron looked back down the stream, certain that his non-euclidean passage up the creek was necessary to find his way back here. “Did you... Just... Come up here normally?”

“What’s is normality got to do with it?” The man barked, “If I knew you were headed thisaways, I’d told you to stay on the road... Even if it’s the wrong ways for ya.”

‘Turn right to go left,’ yeah, yeah... “This is bullshit!...” Aaron lamented, walking down the path towards the spectres.

The man with the cart shrugged, “Every day, you find another nut job. Should’ve realized when I saw his outfit. Say boy!” The man hollered, as he continued onward. “If they get you, just holler for help!” Laughing to himself “Dumbass foreigner.”

The woods were dreary, even in the mid day sun. “Only for you buddy... I don’t know why that is... but only for you...” Aaron stumbled along the uneven path and the uplifted roots. It wasn’t this bad when he was running for his life, was it? He swore that he heard something move, but Aaron could relax; these spooks ate all sound, not made it. “Just keep quiet... And they’ll think I’m not worth their time...” Shaking some sense into his head “Why am I doing this again? I barely got away the first time” And the snake nuzzled up against him. “Right... I have a mysterious blue snake wrapped around my neck, and it’s bloody adorable; that’s why. Makes perfect sense...” Staring it back in the eyes, “Any ideas on how were making this work? Getting your voice back? It work like skeletons or something? Just kill the leader and the rest fall with him? No?...” Looking at it for answers, “Yeah, I know, be quiet and talk another day... I will...” Aaron looked behind him, to the exit. ‘I don’t have to do any of this do I?’ He thought to himself ‘The exit is right there...’ But then he remembered what would happen: The repeat of the nightmares, the continuation of torment. He was frightened of his path, knowing what it was like to stray from this destiny in fear, but the memories seemed all subsided now. The ransom seemed to have left, as he agreed to the terms of his commitment. Aaron smiled, sadly, thinking to the days ahead when this would be all over, and he could play in the streams and rivers as a free man. “Soon we’ll see what role I play in this story after all...”